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The Art of Dying – Drs Peter and Elizabeth Fenwick

These visits, with their very specific farewell message from the dying person, are almost always described as comforting and reassuring - the relatives are left with the strong impression that all is well, and many say that they subsequently lose any fear of death. Jean Hallsworth contacted us after reading an article about approaching-death experiences, and her story is typical:

In 1979, my mother; 74 years old, had been taken in to hospital as an emergency due to feeling generally unwell on a Thursday. The following day she had perked up, and on Saturday it looked as if she would be coming home soon.

I did not visit her on Saturday night but went to see her on Sunday. She seemed to be recovering well. In the early hours of Monday morning, I awoke, half-asleep, and became aware of 'seeing' my mother in colour very clearly, standing in a spotlight in a very dark area, wearing her usual baggy everyday clothes. She was holding her hands together tightly and saying urgently and emphatically, 'Don't worry Jean, I'm all right.' This was repeated then she faded. I turned, to the bedside clock and it was 3.20 a.m.

I was told the following day by the nurse that she had died at 3.20 a.m. This was such an odd experience that I thought I had perhaps dreamed, it or maybe I was a bit crackers, and I told no one at the time; but the article made me feel that perhaps I wasn't as daft as I thought I was.